‘My husband refuses to help with housework unless I pays half the bills’

A woman has taken to social media after realising her husband does nothing for her because she pays the bills. 

Posting on Mumsnet, the upset wife said that no matter what she says her husband will not lift a finger for her, refusing to do the most basic jobs like cooking and cleaning. 

When she asks him to do any work around the house he says no, and she feels like she is begging him to help her but he won’t make any effort to do so. 

She said he usually says it’s because it’s his “day off”, or after being at work all day he does not want to “come home and have more jobs to do”. 

To really rub salt in the wounds, she said he has agreed to do half the housework if she pays half the bills, which she says is impossible for her while he earns five times what she earns. 

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She said: “Is anyone in a situation where your husband/partner/significant other does absolutely nothing to help?  

“I’m at the point where I just don’t think I can cope anymore, he just does nothing to help me. I’ll ask him to help clean or tidy the house or garden and it’s just a straight-up no. 

“He shouldn’t have to do it basically because either ‘I’m at work today so don’t want to have to do anything when I’ll be working later’ or an ‘It’s my day off and I want to relax so why should I do it’.”

But even though he says that due to work he can’t help around the house, she also works and has nobody else who can keep the house in order if not them. 

“I work too and don’t have the luxury of saying I can’t do XYZ because I’m working today or I can’t do it because it’s my day off and I want to relax.

“He doesn’t even help to cook and flat out refuses to wash any pots once I’ve cooked.  It constantly ends up in massive arguments when I’m basically begging for some help to still be told no. 

“He says when I can afford to put half the bill money into the joint he’ll do half the housework, but he gets paid five times more than I do so it’s just not possible for me to do that right now.”

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Her post received multiple replies from other users of the site, who said her husband was being unreasonable and that she should put her foot down. 

One user said: “What a horrible man, I could not stay with a man who is so unsupportive and downright nasty.”

Another said: “This is wrong in every way. He’s a married adult and therefore has to work AND look after himself/you. The amount of money he/you earn doesn’t come into it.”

A third said: “He is never going to change. He has little respect for you. If you have any respect for yourself you’ll leave. It’s a huge upheaval of course but I promise you it will be worth it.”

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